Joie de vivre

I don't change my layout often; in the entire five years I've been on LiveJournal, I think I've changed my background picture maybe four times, my layout style twice, and my journal title once. When I get something the way I like it, I'm loathe to change it up without good reason.

So it was surprising when a random song lyric suddenly made me think "That's how I should redesign my journal!" I liked what I had, don't get me wrong. And it did reflect who I am. But this, ah, this spoke of my deepest self. 

So I did.

There are a lot of words for what I'm trying to express. Joy. Sehnsucht. Longing. Joie de vivre. All of them mean something a little different: bind them all together and you come closer to understanding what Joy means to me. In my mind, there is much bound up in the word "joy". It's so much deeper than happiness, deeper than longing, deeper than contentment. It encompasses everything good I am trying to do and to be. It's soul-filling and irrevocably linked to my relationship with Christ. The concept of Joy has gotten me through some of my darkest days and kept me hoping for the promise of light. I can't describe what it is - it goes beyond words.

And that's why I changed my layout. There are still some things I'm playing with, particularly with the colors, but here it is. Get used to it ... it's probably here to stay for the next five years.