Changes

[eleneariel]

I have 45 minutes before I need to be at work. I have caught up on my friends page, my emails are read, and no one is on AIM. Which means: I post. Whether I have anything to say or not.

There is change in the air. Two months ago, it seems like nothing in my life was the same as it is now. Of course not that much has changed, but what has changed has affected me dramatically. My car has changed. My duties at work have become more varied, more important, and just more. My boss had changed--for the better, I might add. Relationships have changed and grown. I feel a strange duty to protect and hold up Sandra, as if I am stronger than she.

I can feel my maturity level grow daily, even as I see all the foolish things I do.

If the full time position happens, with it's paid vacation, health coverage, and higher salary, my parents are thinking about having me buy my own car. I could sell the older Chrysler and keep that money for my own, even though I don't technically own the car, and have my uncle scout out a newer one for myself. I'm thinking a Sebring coupe--the lines of the convertible are nicer, but I don't want a convertible! At first I wasn't thrilled with the idea, for that means paying my own insurance, repairs, etc. But I will need a car of my own a some point anyway, and buying it now, when I have income and few expenses, makes sense.

I never knew growing up could be so painful and so thrilling at the same time. I am so much more than I was. I am so much less then I hope to be.

I am Mari, age twenty and a half, and I see myself clearly, even if I do not understand. I am scared, but I am ready.

Comments

[savetheolives.livejournal.com]

Darn it, I didn't know you were online. *kicks self*

[eattheolives.livejournal.com]

"I was ELOQUENT!" And that's all you can say?!

*teases*

[savetheolives.livejournal.com]

...what the heck?

Oh. lol Oops. Yes, you were very eloquent. Good post. :-D *adds it to memories*

[eattheolives.livejournal.com]

I didn't mean you had to go that far. Heh.

[savetheolives.livejournal.com]

Guess I'm an overachiever. ;-)

[eattheolives.livejournal.com]

Or something.

[melyndie.livejournal.com]

I am Mari, age twenty and a half, and I see myself clearly, even if I do not understand. I am scared, but I am ready.

Wow. I know how that is.

[evening-damask.livejournal.com]

This was a very enjoyable post to read, dear. I especially like the way you ended it. I sort of know the feeling, but I can't say that I see myself clearly. :)

[eattheolives.livejournal.com]

I sort of know the feeling, but I can't say that I see myself clearly. :)

I'll probably change my mind about that in a day or two. ; )