eleneariel (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
eleneariel) wrote2005-03-10 05:08 pm
eleneariel) wrote2005-03-10 05:08 pm
A brief period of introspection
Every so often something happens that makes me realize how different I've become.
A couple weeks ago in class we split into groups of three for a project. One person had to be the leader and organize the information given by the other two students. The other two in my group naturally assumed that I would be the leader of our group. And the scary thing is: I naturally assumed so too.
I've never been a natural leader in my life. I Do Not Assume Leadership Roles. I have rarely been picked out to be in charge of other people. In charge of projects I could do on my own, yes, but not other people. And yet, there I was, taking over with no problem at all.
Every so often I'll be standing with the "girls" at work (the part time ladies), and suddenly I will realized that I'm actually in a supervisory position over these people who are two and three times older than I am. There are times when I'm the only full time person in the building, and...then problems end up at my desk. I am 20 1/2 and they are coming to ME for a final decision on something?!
But mostly I just accept it and only occasionally am I shocked and surprised. And that's another of the things that has changed.
**********
I'm kind of lonely today.
A couple weeks ago in class we split into groups of three for a project. One person had to be the leader and organize the information given by the other two students. The other two in my group naturally assumed that I would be the leader of our group. And the scary thing is: I naturally assumed so too.
I've never been a natural leader in my life. I Do Not Assume Leadership Roles. I have rarely been picked out to be in charge of other people. In charge of projects I could do on my own, yes, but not other people. And yet, there I was, taking over with no problem at all.
Every so often I'll be standing with the "girls" at work (the part time ladies), and suddenly I will realized that I'm actually in a supervisory position over these people who are two and three times older than I am. There are times when I'm the only full time person in the building, and...then problems end up at my desk. I am 20 1/2 and they are coming to ME for a final decision on something?!
But mostly I just accept it and only occasionally am I shocked and surprised. And that's another of the things that has changed.
**********
I'm kind of lonely today.
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If I were in a group, I would have made you leader too. Peopel often want to make me leader of a group, but I don't like leading people. I don't like telling people what to do.
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